While in Stockholm - My thoughts.


I get asked quite often my views on Feminism.
I don't love labels. I am not a 'Feminist'. I am female -
and appreciate the great strides women have fought for with dignity and grace.
But I don't like to be told how to be a woman.
By a woman or a man.
If I want to stay home and raise my children or work - this is my choice and both are admirable -

How wrong is it for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself?
Anaïs Nin

I do not want to be the leader. I refuse to be the leader. I want to live darkly and richly in my femaleness. I want a man lying over me, always over me. His will, his pleasure, his desire, his life, his work, his sexuality the touchstone, the command, my pivot. I don’t mind working, holding my ground intellectually, artistically; but as a woman, oh, God, as a woman I want to be dominated. I don’t mind being told to stand on my own feet, not to cling, be all that I am capable of doing, but I am going to be pursued, fucked, possessed by the will of a male at his time, his bidding.
Anaïs Nin

I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naïve or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman.
Anaïs Nin

As for 'progressive-ness'

Sweden has a very conservative form of feminism. Quite Victorian. That presents women as helpless innocent victims all the time. (Even Danish and Norwegian feminists are repelled by it)

But perhaps that is an opportunity. Celebrating women's self determination, strength and responsibility and part of that is to treat women as adults who have the strength to harm. And that doing so advances women.

I also believe false rape claims should be treated with the same seriousness as rape. And sex laws need more clarity.
Sex is full of mistakes in discovery .. young men's lives are ruined too when we insert fear and blame.
To protect women is admirable.
But young men deserve the same respect.

It's hard to forgive Sweden for what they did to Julian Assange...
adding senselessly to the nightmare. The unfairness.

We both have a passion for truth. I think this is the undercurrent of our connection. In love and war.

I am curious how they use this political carrot- feminism - upping the anti every political cycle to gain votes but mislead women into thinking this is good for them.
I think it's slightly destructive and paralyzing - in relationships.

I feel sorry for young people dating in Sweden.

Parenting is most important. I parent like I love - it is a dance. Esp with boys. To hold their attention gracefully. As a mother we play such complex roles. I always think of. How am I preparing these young men for the world. How will they contribute their hearts, minds and talent... ?

And in my view-
America is not free -

When I speak with Julian - I sometimes try to console him.
People have a hard time with the truth.
They can't bear it.
There is danger in knowledge. And responsibility ..

And this is why some hate... and place blame ... on him and others that reveal it - it is misdirected fear and confusion.

I think Julian and I compliment each other - his voracious appetite for specifics, detailsand
and my poetic madness ...

Makes for an always interesting and sexy vegan lunch.